'It's like, "Sorry I passed you an STD but I really enjoy your quirky web presence."'
'You know what I'm gonna do from now on? I'm gonna ask people if they're gay before I have sex with them.'
'I can't take a serious naked picture of myself. That's just not who I am.'
Hannah to Jessa and Marnie: 'When I look at both of you, a Coldplay song plays in my heart.'
VIDEO: GIRLS WINS BIG AT THE GOLDEN GLOBES
'I just want someone who wants to hang out all the time, thinks I'm the best person in the world, and wants to have sex with only me.'
'I'm letting you know that it is okay to act on this fantasy because I am gross and so are you.'
'I didn't lose my job, I gave it away.'
'You are from New York, therefore you are just naturally interesting.'
'Why is everyone struggling in New York? Why don't we all just move here and start the revolution?'
'Last time I got drunk I ate all this Brie and threw up on my cell phone.'